Upcoming Changes..

I have never home-schooled a day in my life, nor have I ever desired to until the past 5 months. My junior year has been too much. I was given the perfect blend of personal problems and school stress to weekly anxiety attacks and stress so bad I regularly become ill. I've also become notably more mature than my peers and that made life a bit harder as well. My level of maturity has always been more advanced than people my age but this past 5 months in particular have really changed me, definitely for the better. I had my heart broken for the first time after ending a 2 year relationship, and that was honestly the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. I started my 3rd year of high school completely alone, stressed out, and miserable. My depression hit a new low and so many people around me had no idea just how bad it became. I'm not necessarily losing friends, but I feel the friendships I have fading out as I move through new chapters in my life, and that makes me very sad. I wish I had friends and family who were on the same level as me. I wish I knew more people who understood what it is like to go through so much at such a young age. The newest obstacle I am dealing with is my mother, sister, and I moving out of the home we have lived in for the past 5 years, without a man we have lived with for the past 8. He has always been our financial rock and that is coming to a close as my mother finds a job to try and support us while also taking phlebotemy classes. I on the other hand, am going to homeschool and graduate in May. I am tired. And it is okay that I am tired, I am allowed to be that way. I have more credits than I am supposed to from working my ass off for the past 2 and half years, so it will only take me another 6 months to receive all the credits I need to graduate through a homeschooling program. I can also do this while working, which I would have never had time to do before. I am very emotional about it, I won't lie. At first I felt empowered and strong and ready to take on life, but now I feel very sad. I will miss my daily life at school, not the work load, not waking up at 5 am, and not the stress, but everything else was not half bad. I hope this is the right decision. I hope that I am going to be okay, and I hope that I decide what college career is right for me in time to apply. I need so much healing and hope right now.